Cycle Day 2

Well today is cycle day 2 and my RE says we are on track for transfer on 10/02. I am starting estrogen patches and baby aspirin and lowering my lupron to 5 units today. The countdown is on again!!!

Sorry it has been so long!!

Like I said..it has been super busy around here! Here is what has been going on.

We have had a stomach virus in the house for about a week. Hayden is on round #2. He was home last week with it and I just had to go pick him up again. Pepto Bismol is awesome!!

Both boys are settling in to school pretty good. We have started a new project with them that involves them being responsible for themselves. They have to pick out their own clothes, get themselves dressed, brush teeth on their own, and do their homework on their own, etc. They said that we nag them too much, so we are going to see if it works. Mackenzie is already getting notes home from his teacher about not doing his homework, but we are going to give it some more time and see if he comes around. This seems to make the environment here more pleasant.

I have my first test tomorrow for my medical microbiology class (I know...I should be studying now). Keep your fingers crossed that I do well!

Mackenzie has a birthday on Wednesday and he will be 12..he is growing up so fast!!

Still working on house training the puppy. He is getting much better...but not quite their yet.

Embryo transfer should be in about 15 days!!!!

I am still around

just trying to get adjusted to all the new stuff going on. We are about 4 weeks away from transfer. I will try to catch up soon :)

Things are about to get crazy!

School starts next week for me and the kids!  Macks is going to middle school (first year there) and this will be Hayden's last year in elementary school.  I will be going to college also full time.  I am excited, but worried about getting everything ready.  I like to be prepared so I am trying to work out all the drop off and pick up schedules around my classes (which are different times everyday).  I think I have it figured out except for Thursday afternoons when I need someone to pick them up.  

The kids got to see their dad finally..he came home from Iraq!!  He has been there since January, so they were so excited to get to spend some time with him.  We dropped them off on Thursday and then went to VA Beach for the weekend to visit with Janine's brother.  It was a very lazy trip. We went to the beach and just hung out at their house most of the time.  We got back home Sunday night since Jan had to work on Monday.  I am going to be picking the boys up on this coming Sunday to get ready for the big week.  

I am still on Prometrium and waiting for AF to come so I can get this transfer going.   I just hope it goes fast!   Well that is all I have for now..I have to go chase down the dogs :)

Transfer was canceled :(

Only a minor setback..but still a setback.  We were so hoping that it would be this week!  I felt really bad on Monday night, and went in on Tuesday for an ultrasound and the doctor found fluid in my abdomen and my ovaries were still really swollen (the tops of them were above my belly button)!  My doctor said that if we did the transfer and I were to get pregnant that I could possibly get very very sick and she didnt want to risk it.  I don't want to be sick either, but I am ready for my baby :(  So the plan now is to transfer in about 6 weeks after my body has calmed down.  We still have a bunch of embryos.  They were freezing 4 yesterday and said that today they would have at least 10 to 12 to freeze, so we have nothing to worry about there.  My doctor has an awesome success rate with frozen, so that makes me feel a little better.  We can also schedule the transfer for a Friday when Janine can go with me (she wasnt going to be able to go this week because of work) so that is another positive.  I think this is the best scenerio, but I hate the wait!!

Ok well good news and bad news

I still have 28 embryos, but I have some overstimulation and may not be able to do the transfer this month :(  I will find out tomorrow.

I have 28 fertilized eggs!!!

That's right!!  They retrieved 44 and this morning the lab called and said that 28 fertilized!!  I will get an update on Sunday, go in for ultrasound on Monday, and most likely transfer on Tuesday.  This is so exciting!!!

Retrieval is Thursday!!

Ok so I trigger tonight at 11:30 and retrieval is Thursday morning at 11:30.  Keep me in your prayers!!!

P is for progesterone

I am terrified about the progesterone shots!!  I should be having my retrieval at the end of the week, and I know those big nasty needles are coming.  I dont want them :(  

I went to the doctor today and I have a ton of growing follicles.  They took my follistim dose way down.  There is some concern of OHSS so say a prayer for me that all goes well.  

Cycle Day 1

Well today is cycle day 1..again.  This time is different though because this is THE CYCLE DAY 1!!  This is the last time I will be doing this!  I have struggled alot to get to this point and now  I don't know whether I should be happy or scared or optimistic or sad.  I just really don't know how to feel.  I know that I do feel scared.  I know that I do feel pressure to get this right (and I really dont have any control over it).  I also feel like the rest of my life depends on what happens in the next month.  Oh I think I am going to be sick...

I know that I only have a few people that even read my blog..and that is ok :)  So you few that are there, please say a prayer for me tonight.   Pray that this IVF cycle goes smoothly.  Pray that the end result is a child for us.  Pray that I make it through this without losing my mind.   I really need the prayers.  Thank you so much!! 

O is for Obe

He is our newest edition.  He is a Chihuahua that Janine bought me at Mother's Day.  We love him, but he is driving me crazy!!  I cant get him trained to pee outside.  So he brings our animal count up to 4 (2 dogs and 2 cats) and we are not getting anymore.  I don't know if I will even keep him if he doesnt soon learn that peeing on the kitchen floor is not ok!!!  He is such a beautiful boy :)

Waterfalls and Serial Killers OH MY!!

The boys went to camp last week in the NC mountains.  When we went to pick them up we stayed for awhile and looked at all the beautiful scenery.  This is a waterfall that we stopped at to let the kids swim.  It was amazing..and very cold in July!  We also had to drive through the town in SC where there was a serial killer last week.  It made national news (so you may have heard about it) and we didnt even know he was that close until we got home (he was about 45 minutes from where we live!!).  

N is for Needles and No kids!

Well the Needles are for the IVF process that is now under way.  I am on BCPs and start Lupron on 7/07.  This wasnt the way this was supposed to go, but it looks like this is the only choice for us now.  I am so worried that this isnt going to work.  I am almost so worried that I dont want to do it.  Once I do it, if it doesnt work, then I really dont have much hope left.  I can't afford to do this more than once (at least in the next several years).  So doing it now means this is it!! BTW..that was the last of the negative comments...cause this is going to work!!!!!!  I will be pregnant soon!!

No kids = kids are away at camp until Friday.  This is the first time they have gone to an overnight camp alone.  They are about 2 hours away.  They can't call and they can't email, so I hope they are having fun.  I find myself wondering alot about what they are doing and if they are being safe and watching out for each other.  The camp is sponsored by the military for children of deployed parents and it is free for them to go.  Say a prayer for them and hope they are wearing their lifejackets, sunscreen, and bugspray.

Happy 4th of July!!

Camping was ok..

It wasnt something that I would want to do on a regular basis.  When we got there on Thursday, the campground had just had a major storm, and trees had fallen and there was no power.  I know that power isnt really a big issue when you are camping, but for me taking a hot shower is a big deal.    So I didnt get to shower until Friday night around 11pm.  I was looking and smelling like a seasoned camper for sure LOL!!  The kids had fun and got to swim alot and I even went out in a canoe (which I loved!!).  Maybe we will go again, when the kids are old enough to keep the fire going and put up the tent themselves..until then I think I will be sleeping indoors :)

We are going camping

I have never been before.  Never slept outside or in a tent.  I dont know how this will go because it is really hot outside.  I will let ya know.  Wish me luck!!

Things have been crazy round here!!

I have been busy these past few weeks!!  

Mackenzie had lots of activities for the end of the school year and then the kids got out of school.   

We got a new puppy that is taking lots of my time.

I am now in school and having to study harder than ever.

My ebay has picked up and i am selling alot right now.

Soooo...hopefully things will get back to normal soon.  We should be getting started with IVF in the next month!!!  

M is for Mufasa and Mischa

Mufasa and Mischa are our two cats.  Mufasa is the old man and Mischa is the young lady.  They dont like each other or other animals...which leads to problems quite often.  Mufasa enjoys playing in the sewer and laying on our neighbors porch.   Mischa spends her time killing birds (and trying to bring them inside) and laying on our bed sleeping.  The picture above is Mufasa..at age 15.

L is for Lisa and leisure time

Lisa - is my older sister.  She is the nicest person I have ever known (and I am not just saying that because she is my sister..she really is.)  She will do anything for anyone and be happy that she is doing it..even if she really doesnt want to.  She is a good friend to me and listens to all my sob stories and complaints.  She is beautiful, successful and an awesome mother.

leisure time - is something that I should have had alot of lately.  Being that I am unemployed, I should have extra time...but I don't.  How did everything get done when I had a job?  What will happen when I go back to work???  Needless to say that day will be coming too soon!!

The picture above is me and my brother and sister :)

K is for Kelly

Ok..I was having a hard time coming up with any K words..so I sort of worked the K in.  Kelly is a lady that I just met today.  She works at York Tech.  She informed me that I will be starting school this summer and it will all be paid for by WIA (since I got laid off from my job). They will pay for my classes, books, gas, and anything else that is necessary for school.  I am going to be taking medical lab tech classes.  This was not my first choice, but everything else had 1 1/2 - 2 year waiting lists.  I am really excited!

J is for Janine, Josh and Jonatha Brooke

Janine - means "Gift from God"..or that is what her parents say :) Only her family can call her Jan.  I try to and most of the time she gets pissed.  At work they call her J9.  Don't you think Jan is so much easier??

Josh - is Janine's brother.  He is her only full sibling (same mom and dad).  He lives in Virginia Beach.  We only see him a few times a year..but love him dearly.  Jan...I mean Janine..tries to get him to move down here all the time but it is just not gonna happen.  

Jonatha Brooke - www.jonathabrooke.com - She is an amazing musician that Janine introduced me to.  She is now one of my all time favorites.  She is not very well known ..but should be.  Check out her website :)

Fertility Statue

So in San Francisco there was a fertility statue at the Ripley's museum.  Here I am rubbing it and hoping it works :)

We Are Home!!

Vacation was lots of fun.. but it is great to be home!  I am going to catch up on all my favorite blogs and will write here as soon as I get a chance :)

VACATION!!!

We are leaving for vacation on Wednesday and will be gone until 4/19!!  We are going to visit California, Oregon and Washington.  Janine's sister lives in Washington so that is the purpose of the trip, but we are going to see a few more places while we are there.  See ya when we get back :)

I is for IVF

IVF - is where it looks like we are heading.  We had such high hopes this time..but this wasn't the one.  We will have our baby...one day :)

H is for our House and Hayden

Our House - We have lived in our house for 3 1/2 years and we really like it here.  We are in a great neighborhood and school district.  The kids have lots of friends here and sidewalks to ride their bikes.  We had to do some work when we moved in..and there is still alot more to do.  We will have it the way we want it one day.  I hope to stay here for a long, long time (unless we hit the lottery LOL).  FYI...I was excited about posting pictures of our house...but now i can't find them anywhere on this computer.  When the computer genius gets home I will have her look for them.

Hayden - he is our youngest.  He is smart and sensitive and handsome.  He is head strong and bossy.  He is loyal and loves to make new friends.  He likes movies, magic, video games and eating.  He is one of a kind :)

G is for Guilt and Gia

Guilt and Gia...

No, they don't go hand in hand.  As a matter of fact, these are totally unrelated. BTW, this is Janine blogging...the guilt is mine for not participating in Carey's adventures on here.  It's also for all that is bothering me today.  I am upset with myself for being so overweight, guilty for eating junk food and not getting nearly enough exercise.  I am guilty of not being a  friend who stays in touch, missing my best friend's wedding to go on vacation, and not answering my phone about 75% of the time.  Getting lost in the wealth of information on the internet is much like burying my nose in a book.  I'm an intellectual, a seeker of knowledge. The computer is millions of varied topics, free for my browsing, yet I feel guilty for the amount of time I am immersed in it.  I wonder if I had my nose in a book all the time 20 years ago- would people think of it in the same way?  My guess is probably not... Anyways, So the biggest thing affecting me today is my current physical state- and to be honest, I'm extremely overwhelmed by the amount of disappointment I feel in myself right now- I am on the verge of tears.

Okay, so I will end this depressing and "who wants to read this kind of crap?" posting on a happier note.   GIA...

Gia is my (hopefully) soon to be sister in law.  She successfully transformed my closest brother Josh (13 mos apart) from a hopeless alcoholic *sorry, Josh* to a real man with aspirations.  She is witty and has a pretty good sense of humor.  She is intelligent, fluent in spanish, and beautiful.  She is driven and makes conscious decisions.  Gia and I are alike in ways, but vastly different in others.  I appreciate her love for my brother, and I hope they can continue the relationship in the supportive ways they began.  I heart Gia...

PS. I am hoping we can make it til Tuesday for Carey's pregnancy test!!! Cross your fingers!

We will be back to our regularly scheduled program after the break

I am going to Daytona Beach, Florida tomorrow to visit with my mother and my brother.  My niece will be having her 2nd birthday party on Saturday.  I will write again when i get back :)

F is for Feet and being Fortunate

Feet - I have huge friggin feet!!  They are size 10...or sometimes 11!!  My dad has always called them skis..and I have hated it my whole life.  The good thing is that i can usually find shoes on sale because not many people buy them that big :)

being Fortunate - I don't have a job now and that is stressful...but I am trying to focus on what I do have.  I have Janine, who is my soulmate.  We have wonderful (and challenging) children.  I have a loving family.  I have great pets.  I have devoted and supportive friends (who I don't see often enough).  I am fortunate and thank God for giving me this wonderful life. 

Above are some pictures of usat the lake last weekend.

E is for Ellie

I am not finding much to blog about that starts with "E"... so this will be short and sweet :)

E is for Ellie our dog.  She is an awesome pet.  We have had her for about 2 years. She does lots of tricks and guards our house and yard.  She tries to mother the cats and the kids.  She is so smart and definitely one of the family.

D is for Dieting, Destiney

Dieting- is something I am always doing..or trying to do!!  I have been overweight most of my life and can never seem to get control of it.  I try to blame it on my PCOS or being big boned..but I know that I just eat too much junk.  I don't like alot of vegetables so I eat way too many carbs. Hopefully one day I will reach my goal..but until then you have to just love me the way I am:)

Destiney - is my friend's daughter.  She and her sister come over and the stay the night with us alot.  We just love her and think she will be a famous model one day (see picture above).